Friday 27 December 2013

The 20 New Year Resolutions For Liverpool Fans


20. Thou shall not criticise Lucas Leiva

19. Or... Joe Allen...

18. Or Jordan Henderson...

17. Or Raheem Sterling...

16. Or any player / youngster who deserves a bit of backing.

15. Thou shall start to sing Brendan Rodgers name.

14. Thou shall not take a picture of 'Stevie G' with your iPhone when he comes over to take a corner.

13. Stand & applaud him instead.

12. Thou shall not take photographs of the Hillsborough Memorial... particularly in some kind of 'selfie' pose. It's a memorial, not a tourist attraction.

11. Thou shall applaud the opposition keeper as he approaches the Kop for the 2nd half (always.)

10. Thou shall not leave on 40 minutes to go and get a piss flat plastic bottle of Carlsberg and regurgitated pork cock in bun for £9.99.

9. Or leave early to 'beat the traffic' for that matter.

8. If you are an out of towner, like I once once... you sit in a queue for fucking hours and pay your dues.

7. Thou shall not ever visit 'The Boot Room' Sports Cafe.

6. Thou shall not care more about the bet idiotic bet you put on. You lad.

5. Thou shall never, ever, ever buy a split scarf for a Premier League game.

4. Thou shall not start moaning again as soon as we lose a game or get a bad result.

3. Thou shall not fail to recognise who our substitutes are when they are warming up. "Ilori? Who's he?"

2. Thou shall never, ever sing 'Who are ya?' You're not singing anymore?' or 'Easy! Easy!'

1. Thou SHALL buy Red All Over The Land next year & support other independent fanzines, websites & merchandise sellers...


Tuesday 24 December 2013

The Anfield Shrine Column - Issue 194 RAOTL - Sterling Support

Originally published in print. Issue 193 of Red All Over The Land Fanzine

Sterling Support

I wanted to write an article in support of Raheem Sterling. To be honest, I’ve found it hard to motivate myself to do so… but I am determined, so here we go…




I should imagine like a lot of Liverpool fans at the moment, I currently see Sterling as a little bit of a frustration. He burst on to the scene as an extremely exciting and talented young player, only to be over-hyped and perhaps over-played before retreating to the doldrums of reserve team and U21 football – which in fairness, is where you’d expect most players of his age to be!


We are a strange bunch at times, us Liverpool fans. We pride ourselves on being different… being a supportive crowd, patient, with the ability to support a player in a red shirt whatever their age, nationality or path in football. Yet sometimes, we seem to let ourselves down and throw all of that out of the window. It seems that every now and then, a player comes along that Liverpool fans just don’t ‘take to.’ Deep down, we just don’t seem to LIKE them. Moses is another one of our current crop currently experiencing that very malaise. Although in Victor’s case, I'm inclined to say it’s justified.

Sterling’s rise to prominence and indeed promise was so fast that now we seem to be blaming him for not living up to his own hype. In reality, the position he finds himself in now, is a completely natural one. Having just turned 19 he is getting some valuable first team action, showing some promise and developing.
However, most of the Anfield crowd currently don’t seem to see it like that. We are expecting him to come out and score wonder goals, terrorise defences and beat 2 or 3 players every time he has the ball. It is no wonder that he is looking a bit hesitant.

But I think that there is something that lies deeper in our current frustration with him… I’m just not sure that we like him. Is it perhaps because after showing such initial promise we heard rumours of him falling into the trap of being an overpaid, over-hyped and not highly intelligent young footballer… getting himself into scrapes with the police and the odd scouse hood rat? It’s not the sort of behaviour we like to see from our young players – we’re much more forgiving of a hard-working and seemingly ‘nice’ lad like Henderson. Is it also perhaps that he’s a Londoner? And there’s just something about that which we can’t take to. Is it also perhaps because he runs a little bit like a camp duck… and deep down we just suspect that he doesn’t fancy it in a 50/50? We assume he’s lightweight and easy to shove off the ball. We’re not convinced he tracks back… we’re not sure how much he REALLY cares.

Who knows, maybe we’re right? You can’t escape he does run strangely... and he hasn’t yet got the bullish strength and centre of gravity of Coutinho. But let’s not forget, Coutinho is a good 2 or 3 years older and with much more experience.


Sterling is showing some promising signs again; let’s not crush the poor lad through our slightly lazy prejudices and wild assumptions. They may well all be right… but as Liverpool fans, it’s not in our nature not to give a player a chance and one thing is for certain, if we don’t get off his back a bit… he certainly won’t turn into the player we all hope he can be. 

Thursday 12 December 2013

Red All Over The Land - Issue 194

Issue 194 of Red All Over The Land will be out for the Cardiff game at Anfield next week (the 21st) - featuring a piece from me on the support of a certain Raheem Sterling. 

Pick up a copy for only £2!


To subscribe or contribute to RAOTL contact redallovertheland@gmail.com

Tuesday 10 December 2013

Just a couple of reasons I love FC St. Pauli...

I may be a Liverpool fan through and through, but I have an unashamed love for a Bundesliga 2 team... FC St. Pauli. This post is from our sister blog Lazy Genius...

There are many reasons I love FC St. Pauli of Hamburg... the area itself being one of them, that's before you even consider the club. But on opening their most recent newsletter to my Inbox, within seconds I had read a couple of stories that made me love them even more, the sort of stories you won't find in the e-bulletins of most big corporate football clubs these days...

Today around 1,000 people responded to an invitation from FC St. Pauli for the needy to come to the open ballroom of the south stand to be fed, enjoy drinks and receive warm clothing.
Fc St. Pauli Christmas Table
Read more at Lazy Genius